I’m just a sucker with no self-esteem

The Offspring to me, as funny it may sound, was my introduction to metal. Hence, I thought to give them a well-deserved place in the Anthology. Music as any art takes influences from many sources (genres). One of those was metal. Punk has never come into communion with my music tastes and appreciations. If it wouldn’t be for the rock and metal influences, the band probably would pass unnoticed to me. I was introduced by friends who surprisingly were into the punk big time. I am saying surprisingly because many The Offspring fandom don’t come from punk culture. They sound too mainstream, too light compared to for example Sex Pistols. However, as with punk, words do matter and maybe not political, they have a number of protest songs.

One of those is a love protest song. Yes, that’s right. We all too well hear and see females with broken hearts. Like probably the vast majority of things, same for love, it is not gender-specific. Men don’t talk too much about it, simply not to be made subject of laughter or being called a ‘pussy’. Yet, it happens and I would think it happens a fair amount of time. Nevertheless, it’s how I felt and I still can relate to this song more than 20 years later. Things do change, but one thing is certain. Some men, especially the one who do care, are being abused. Still, we all feel the desire for the prettier sex and that makes us suckers. Especially us, suckers with no self-esteem.

If you don’t know what I am talking about then watch this clip:

The song is about this guy, really gagging for this girl. Whether he is in love or simply blindly physically attracted to her we don’t know. We do know, however, he wants to have a proper relationship with her and goes far and beyond to make it happen. He is at this point though, someone has called it a narcissistic relationship, where he realises he is being used and is committed to end this relationship. That is until he sees her again.

The lack of confidence but also the lack of belief in himself, and probably a thought that he is punching above his weight places him in this emotional prison. For him, the grass is not greener next door. He truly wants this girl but she turns up to him only when there’s no alternative. I don’t need to be a psychologist to tell you how much it sucks. And hey! I have been there too so I am not judging. I do feel for the chap.

He said they’ve made plans to spend a night together, but by the tone of how it sounds, it’s likely he made plans and got stood up. I don’t believe they live together but it is kind of serious. For him for sure, for her… she wants to keep him. I reckon she is the femme fatale type of a woman and because of this, his insecurity is very high. He also is playing someone he is not. He is trying to make a statement and win her over by buying shit. Man o man, how many times, how many men lost their fortunes to win the hand of a lady. He really is sinking to the bottom for that girl. And then he actually does.

The more you suffer,
the more it shows you really care.
Right? Yeah, yeah, yeah

This is the low in my opinion that he hits. It doesn’t go worse than this. This was my low, and I bet many other guys can relate. It wouldn’t be such a popular song in the end, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah! Thought so!

Somehow the acceptance of suffering, as a way to win her over, is the most tragic in the entire song. The fact he answers himself to his rhetorical question shows he doesn’t seek help, he seeks reassurance and approval in his conquest to win his girlfriend’s heart. He understands it’s not just suffering, he has to show her he really cares. So he suffers, and so he waits, while she continues to sleep with his friends.

To lift the mood a little here’s an acoustic version of the song performed live! It’s very good. Enjoy ?

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